Prince Petr Kropotkin
Is ferrying the workers
Back to the newly-declared Anarchist Republic
Of Moulsecoomb
The Driver is returning their fares
Dividing them equally among the passengers
Aubrey Beardsley’s squeezing through
Great pink labia tunnels
As giant cocks sprout up like trees
Along Saint James’s Street
Hermaphroditic aristocracy
Fuck opulently
Outside Morrison’s
In impossible positions
While their bus
Is conveniently
Delayed
Dusty Springfield quite ignores
Her pre-decided route
And cutting up Dyke Road
Sings her siren song out to the Downs
And closing his eyes the driver counts
To ten, a million
Mascara tinted teardrops well up
Around Seven Dials
And roll down to the sea
Norman Wisdom, skidding wildly
Careering across Grand Parade
Colliding with the Who
Patrick Hamilton is stalled
Beside the West Pier
Shabby and dissolute and watching
As Virginia Woolf goes down
Beneath the waves
Ralph Vaughn Williams
Hums hymns
To Hollingbury
Bob Copper roars in harmony
Passengers paying their
Fares on Adam Faith
Are told by the driver that
She don’t want money
She won’t tell them
What she does want
And even when
They offer her
Their hearts, then all she does
Is play it cool
The traffic now is backing up
All the way down Falmer Road
And they suspect that she’s making
A fool of them
“Well I’m offering you a diamond ring”
Shouts one, in desperation
“But all you do is turn me down”
“What do you want, oh boy?”
She quietly replies
“You’re going to town on me”
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
Pursuing Moriarty
Drives furiously across the Downs
Towards Beachy Head
They disappear into the mist
But no-one sees them fall
On Edward Booth all of the passengers
Are stuffed and mounted in
Grotesque positions
Clawing at the windows
The driver takes
Pot shots at postmen
He seldom misses
Omozap and Afterblatz!
On Jeff Keen’s bulging, dayglo-painted
Upper deck
Dr Gaz still battles with
Vulvana, rayguns blazing
Collages flash five frames a second
In the windows
As the bus careers across
The council gardens
Trailing silver foil and coloured
Plastic through eternity
(c) 2014.